DeerlyBeloved

[lordofsparkles]

deerlyBeloved: LordOfThunder You know what happens when centuries of experience meets god-like stamina? A magical, life-altering night. Recently off the tragic breakup with a world renowned scientist, this well travelled prince of the universe is seeking someone to fill that empty void in his heart. Don't let all that hard muscle and grizzled eye patch throw you off, this man is nothing but a teddy bear inside. He'll be gentle with more than just your heart. Being Asgardian, he possesses gifts unknown to mortal men. So be warned, you'll never find another like him.

( Thor Odison | 1500+ | M | You )

Comments

un: top price, i am so sorry for her

[tagartist]

normally i use "this is a gift from the gods" in a hyperbolic fashion, but for once, it's actually true

Never apologize

[lordofsparkles]

I do not know what these arrows mean, nor are there any gifts here.

[tagartist]

omg
you are one in and of yourself
the kind that keeps on giving


i don't know if i should explain the symbols to you or if i should keep my dignity in tact right now

[lordofsparkles]

What dignity could be lost in explaining them to me?

[ Just gonna....ignore the rest of that. Because what is even happening? ]

[tagartist]

[ That's a fair reaction to Chloe in general, really. ]

... like 30% of whatever i have
but ok

i'm gonna assume you've never used a dating app because why would thor need to use a dating app
people choose the symbols based on whether or not they'd want to get to know you/go out with you
you can only choose one and usually you have to select one before you can talk to someone directly

means "no thanks"
means "i'd be your friend"
means "i'd date you"
and uh

[ There's a really long pause before she sends this last text. ]


means "i'd fuck you"

[ Yep. ]

i should probably learn to choose the star for situations exactly like this

[lordofsparkles]

[ That's gonna take him a moment. Because, wow, Chloe. That's rather forward. A right arrow to mean THAT? he's not accustomed to people being so very forward. But he respects that she is aware of what she'd told him, and appreciates that she educated him. ]

That is very informative. I give you the little star! And I am in your debt for being so accommodating.

[tagartist]

[ Shamelessly Forward is Chloe's middle name, probably. ]

cool i take it

how serious are you about this "in your debt" thing

[lordofsparkles]

Indeed. You have done me a favor and prevented many unintended consequences.

[ He would have started sending all of his friends the right arrow. He enjoys their company, but perhaps not that much. ]

un: robin❣️hearts

[oversight]

I have to say, I loved you in Adventures in Babysitting!

[lordofsparkles]

I have had no adventures with small children.

[oversight]

It's a movie! And it's not you, but some likeness of you. Not a close approximation. You can borrow my copy if you want.

[lordofsparkles]

Are these adventures epic tales of combat?

[oversight]

There is some combat, I guess. It's mostly suspense. Some action. Iconic!

[lordofsparkles]

I do not have time to waste on your suspense.

[ Don't mind him, he's cranky. ]

[oversight]

Oh? What's got you tied up?

[lordofsparkles]

[ If he knew about "???????" he would reply with "??????" because that's his face, you just can't see it. ]

Take a look around.

[oversight]

Oh, right. It's crazy out there... I mean, I've seen it worse, but I get your point.

[lordofsparkles]

As have I, but I do not see this places being the epicenter of a cosmic event.

[oversight]

How do you see this place?

[lordofsparkles]

A trap.

[oversight]

You’re not wrong. How do you feel about us being the "sleepers"?

[lordofsparkles]

That is a lie. If we were but sleeping, our friends back home would know us to be asleep. I have heard no such claims.

[oversight]

So, what are you thinking? No one can leave, we don't control who comes to town, and there's definitely a malevolent and benevolent persona behind some of what's going on.

[acidwashjeans]

[ NO THOUGHTS ABOUT THE PROFILE PICTURE OR TEXT OR ANYTHING ]



You aren't really a god, right?

(Dated June 13th cause he was dead until then)

[lordofsparkles]

[ Sure, sure. And Loki's completely trustworthy. ]

Of course I am.

[acidwashjeans]

Well sure, you think you're a god.
But what does that mean? Like you're omnipossible?

[lordofsparkles]

Omnipresent? No, I am Thor. I am the God of Thunder. It is Heimdall who can see all things in the nine realms.

[acidwashjeans]

But aren't gods supposed to be everywhere and be able to do anything and know everything?

[ He went to sunday school. Once. He knows all about this. ]

[lordofsparkles]

No. Not all of us.

Have you not heard tales of me?

[acidwashjeans]

No? America's super christian, dude. We've already got Jesus.

[lordofsparkles]

I did not know that Stark's gardener was a religious figure.

[acidwashjeans]

Who?

[ They don't have Mexican gardeners in Indianna yet]

I'm talking about Jesus Christ? Son of God? Born to Mary in like zero BC and then got killed but came back to life? Forgives all sins?

[lordofsparkles]

You must be more specific, there are many gods to be the son of. I'm one, but I don't have any kids. The same goes for my brother. Perhaps you mean Zeus? I hear he's got a lot of children. Then again, it is said he is not the forgiving type.

[acidwashjeans]

Zeus? God of the Romans Zeus?



Holy shit.

[lordofsparkles]

No, the Greeks. That whole Greek-Roman change over is still a sore spot for him. Or so I've heard.

[acidwashjeans]

Okay.

In my world Zeus is just this old myth. He's not actually real.




[ what is happening ]

So you're like. An actual god??

[lordofsparkles]

Yes. Thor, the God of Thunder.

Just because you have not met any does not mean they are merely myth.